There’s been some chatter in the news lately about adult virgins and their quest for sexual gratification. The Independent recently ran a piece about the challenges faced by Japan’s growing number of distressed virgins in their 30’s and 40’s, and Vocative reports that angst-ridden San Francisco Bay Area virgins are driving business for sex therapists near Silicon Valley.
Overwhelmingly heterosexual men, the adult virgins featured in these articles are not content with their condition, and actively seek therapy to help them alleviate their sexual anxiety and learn about adult sexuality. For example, as part of a therapeutic program in Japan called “virgin academia,” one 41-year-old man takes life drawing classes, where he sketches naked women in an attempt to better understand the female body.
Every year or so, the media spotlights situations where experts help sexually inexperienced adults jump-start their sex lives. (Remember how popular stories about sex surrogates were when the film The Sessions was released?) Yet, year after year, news organizations manage to neglect an entire group of trusted American institutions that have been tending to the needs of adult virgins for nearly half a century.
Nevada brothels understand all too well the plight of the adult virgin.
In the USA, prostitution is only legal in the state of Nevada, where licensed prostitutes work out of regulated brothels like Sheri’s Ranch near Las Vegas. It should come as no surprise to learn that a significant portion of customers visiting Sheri’s Ranch are virgins over the age of 21 seeking a “cure” for their adult virginity.
The go-to brothel for adult virgins
Dena, the madam of Sheri’s Ranch, has worked at the sex den for nearly a decade. She states that thousands of men have been “de-virginized” under her watch, and claims that the reason virgins flock to Sheri’s is because courtesans at the brothel offer more than merely physical sex.
“A lot of adult virgins don’t have much experience being alone and intimate with a woman,” says the madam. “A man who is anxious about his virginity needs to ease into the situation and learn how to relax with a sexual partner.”
“One-on-one conversation, gentle touching, a tender exploration of each other’s bodies – these things are key to enjoying first-time sex. Getting to know your partner both intellectually and sensually, so that you glide into penetrative sex and it doesn’t seem nearly as frightening. This is what a virgin experiences at Sheri’s.”
When dealing with virgin clientele, the bordello’s working girls approach the matter with compassion and empathy. Perhaps this is why Sheri’s has garnered a reputation as the go-to Nevada brothel for the sexually unfamiliar.
The establishment’s private and non-judgmental environment is ideal for men who most likely need to relax and loosen up with female company before moving on to coitus. Erin, a sex worker at the ranch who specializes in virgins, agrees.
“Men come here with the goal of ‘just getting it over with’ and that’s the wrong way to think,” she says. “Sex is about connecting, and that connection starts by exchanging ideas and discovering the common interests and desires shared between me and my client. He doesn’t need to be hyper-focused on the physical part – he’s going to get that no matter what, because he’s with a working girl – he just needs to enjoy my company and allow himself to finally have a good time with a woman.”
So are the ladies of Sheri’s Ranch as effective as sex therapists with their virgin clients? Another licensed prostitute, Destini, chimes in.
“I’m not a certified sex therapist and I don’t have an advanced degree in psychology or medicine,” she says. “All I know is that when a man leaves my bungalow after losing his virginity, he leaves with a smile from ear to ear.”