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It seems some input from me, everyone’s infamous “Brothel Champion” is needed here:

I’ve been visiting brothels in Nevada for going on 13 years now. So I feel comfortable saying a few details about how this whole ‘terrifying’ (I use that word glibly) works and what it costs. Here’s the low-down gents:

1. Each brothel has a ‘house minimum’ that is somewhere in the low hundreds of dollars. NOTHING can be obtained for less than house minimum…and about all you are going to get for right at house minimum is a cup of coffee and a rather vigorous hug. In short, don’t be a doofus and bring a C-note with you and think you are getting anything. This isn’t some ‘lot lizard’ at your local truck stop.

2. NOTHING IS FREE in this world. That said, drive yourself to the house if possible. Don’t take a cab. Don’t take a limo. That’s all I’m going to say about that.

3. Now…as to the ‘meat and potatoes’ of this whole thing: Prices range wildly at a brothel. As a rule, assume that the more you ask for the more expensive the price. The dude wanting to dress like Elvis while she dresses as Minnie Mouse and rams him in the ass with a copper pipe is likely to pay more than the dude just looking to get a little BJ.

4. If you are an average dude of average means – YOU CAN party at a brothel and enjoy yourself. Stripe and I have been doing it for years and neither of us is independently wealthy. We save for our trips, we go out, we have a good time. If you are looking for your basic party, you can usually find that somewhere in the mid to high $$$ depending on the girl. If she’s really popular, or if the place is packed and she has a choice of clients, that price might go a little higher that night in to the low $$$$. It’s a stone cold reality that YOU have a major impact on that price also. Your appearance, hygiene, attitude, and personality will ALL contribute to what you get quoted. Let me clear that, when I say ‘appearance,’ I don’t necessarily mean that ‘hot guys’ have an advantage. If you’re a good looking guy whole freely advertises that ‘I don’t need to pay for it, ya know.’ I’ll all but guarantee you that guy gets a ‘douchebag tax’ added to his price.

5. If you want to maximize your brothel dollar; follow these simple rules:
– Show up freshly showered and dressed in clean clothes. Do NOT think that Axe body spray is a substitute for a shower. Cleanliness is next to Godliness. It’s called soap…use it…AND the washcloth. Get intimate with a razor. Manscape. Brush your teeth. If you have facial hair, corral that shit appropriately. A little dusting of cologne can’t hurt, but don’t bathe in it. Rule of thumb; if you catch more than a passing hint of your own cologne throughout the day, you are wearing too much.

– Be NICE. Introduce yourself. If you are talking to her for any length of time, buy her a drink. If she’s a smoker, light her cigarette for her. Be a gentleman. In short, be the dude she’d want to sleep with even if she wasn’t working.

– Be HONEST. If you don’t have a fortune to spend, that’s fine. Tell her what you have to work with and what you would like. If she is unwilling or unable to do that – it’s okay. Nothing ventured, nothing gained. So long as you aren’t doing anything bone-headed…or aren’t so far off the mark with what you offering, chances are she’s going to tell you what she CAN do for that price…or suggest that for a bit more she could give you what you are looking for.

– Continue to be NICE. Even if things don’t work out….stay nice throughout the whole process. Each girl has her own set of prices. For THAT girl on THAT night at THAT time on THAT trip…she might have said no. BUT…you were an okay dude the whole time and what you offered wasn’t bad…and she knows three girls who haven’t partied in three days who she could send your way and would be happy to meet your price. If you were nice, she will.

My Guide to Newbies has more details…but this is the basics of it guys. Now GO GET YOURSELF SOME!


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