[Allissa]

I agree with Flint, you can always ask the hostess to speak to her and then you do not feel as much obligation but on either end you should never feel like you have to go through with something you are not comfortable with. Sounds like she is a great girl and has your attention so your odds are in your favor of everything working out. Downside to not making an appointment you do not have that guarantee she will be available or even ready for the day. Maybe try asking in your email if she would mind to meet when you arrive if she is available but not to have the 100% expectation of a party.