My wife and I asked the same questions our first time. What we ended up doing was our own research of profiles and reviews seerately. We each came up with the names of 3 ladies we thought we would be comfortable with. We then compared our lists. Because we know each other so well it wasn’t a shock that 2 of the 3 names were the same. We emailed the 2 ladies and had good discussions of boundaries and expectations. That got us to our first and most amazing experience of our lives.
All the ladies that cater to couples are very good with other women. You have to find the one whose personality best fits both of your needs.