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Real Sex Workers Define the GFE (Girlfriend Experience)

On April 10th, Starz will launch its new series The Girlfriend Experience, a sure-to-be controversial show about the life of a high class prostitute. The Steven Soderbergh produced series premiered at the Sundance Film Festival earlier this year and has received exceptionally good reviews. The trials and triumphs of the show’s main character, played by Mad Max: Fury Road’s Riley Keough, will likely provoke discussion about the state of prostitution in the 21st century, and will certainly introduce mainstream audiences to the term “girlfriend experience,” or its more commonly used acronym “GFE.”

So, what exactly is a GFE?

Anyone who has been searching online for a professional sexual companion over the past ten to fifteen years has probably encountered the term, because the GFE is indisputably the most popular offering in this current age of harlotry.

When a customer negotiates with a prostitute for a BJ (fellatio), DATY (cunnilingus), or even an FMF (threesome) it’s pretty cut and dry what the experience will entail. But GFE is a nebulous designation that appears to have no conclusive definition. Obviously, the term implies that the prostitute will, to some extent, act like her client’s girlfriend. Wikipedia describes GFE as follows:

Within the sex industry, GFE is a common term for a sexual encounter in which both the escort and the client are willing to engage in reciprocal sexual pleasure and some degree of emotional intimacy.

Punter Forums and similar online prostitution communities have disputed the definition of the term ad nauseum, often boiling the experience down to a few affectionate acts that a person would perform with his or her significant other. French kissing, cuddling, foreplay, and an overall greater familiarity between client and courtesan are all associated with the girlfriend experience. But these are mere aspects of the service that shed little light on a sexual phenomenon that stems from a strong desire for empathy. To really understand GFE’s popularity, perhaps we should not only be asking what it is, but also why there is an increasing demand for it.

In today’s high-tech society, we seem to be making connections at every turn, with every text, Facebook like, and Twitter update. But are these new tools augmenting our connectivity to one another or replacing a more personal way of conversing. These days, exchanges that used to require direct human contact are often reduced to dispassionate emails and emoticons. Maybe these poor excuses for connecting have us longing for something more substantial. Or perhaps as we juggle work, family, and sex in our fast-paced environment, it’s more difficult than ever for quality affection between two people to occur naturally, at the best time, and at the same level for each participant. One thing’s for sure: many people are paying for real, face to face (and body to body) intimacy with sex workers who encourage clients to lower their barriers, expose their vulnerabilities, and experience genuine emotion. People are craving the girlfriend experience like never before, and they’re purchasing the service again and again.

The definition of GFE does not truly exist, at least not in a definitive form. The service is as diverse and varied as the sex workers who offer it and the customers who partake of it. Below is a sampling of personal perspectives on the girlfriend experience from women most qualified to speak on the subject: high-end courtesans currently working at Sheri’s Ranch, a legal Nevada brothel.

Brittney-Ryder-Girlfriend-ExperienceThe GFE party is everything you desire in a relationship without the every day hassles a relationship requires. It’s all the bonuses of a girlfriend. It’s the good times and none of the bad times. How would you like to enjoy a girlfriend for a day, a couple days, or a couple meetings a month over the span of a year?  Sounds great, right? It’s phenomenal!

It’s THE experience, and with me it’s rarely a one time meeting. It’s about getting to know one another, understanding one another and caring for one another over many sessions. It’s taking the first encounter and building off each and every meeting. It’s about spending time together and getting involved in conversations and creating a comfort level to it’s extreme, where I actually become your most trusted confidante. It’s going from having mechanical sex to creating these extraordinary levels of sexual pleasures and developing an intimate rapport that arouses both of us to a point of unparalleled ecstasy.

Take all the good times of a relationship and add the exceptional sexual pleasures and what you get is this ultimate experience of a lifetime.

Brittney Ryder

GFE-Nevada-BrothelCollecting money and having sex is a transaction. Listening and connecting is an experience. Blurring the line between the two and  turning the transaction into an experience is my description of The Girlfriend Experience. Personally I prefer being able to fulfill the role as your girlfriend rather than offering straight sex, getting the chance to know you and sharing more of myself.

I am not a robot and neither are you. We both have feelings. Although some of my clients do want to get to the point, there are clients that want to feel an emotional connection. Holding hands on the couch and chatting, soaking in a bubble bath and staring into each other’s eyes, playing video or board games and laughing. The time spent building this connection leads to an amazing sexual euphoria shared by both. Feeling every moment instead of rushing for a finish. At the end of our experience we will know each other like old lovers anxiously awaiting our next time together  to try new things and build our brothel relationship. With no nagging or fighting!! Sounds like a dream…. But it can be made a reality.


GFE-ProstituteI am extremely open-minded, I enjoy almost anything sexual. My Ideal party is sharing my time with a wonderful gentleman who will spoil me as much as I spoil him. I really like the GFE sessions where it feels like I am on a real date.  A nice gift upon arrival such as flowers, perfume, lingerie, sexy clothes or anything that makes you think of me is always a nice surprise. I just love seeing that chivalry still exists.

In our private bungalow we relax by the fire, cuddling and listening to our favorite music. Taking things slow in the most sensual way, teasing and tantalizing one another. Enjoying an evening filled with romantic dinner, fun games, and scary movies where I can snuggle in your arms or you can comfort me while I jump and scream. We can slip into a nice bubble bath or hot tub – it’s great foreplay. I love the way our bodies slide against one another while we caress. Once we’re all worked up and begging for one another, we can retire to the bed for the most intimate pleasures of life. That’s just a small glimpse into my most desired session. There are more that I absolutely love, but I’ll just have to whisper those in your ear when we’re alone together.

–  Destini

Girlfriend-Experience-BrothelGFE, or the Girlfriend experience is about making the best connection you can make, without the draw backs. Its getting to know someone intimately, getting comfortable. Spending quality time focused on another person and it being more than just sex, although the sex is definitely an amazing part of it.

With the girlfriend experience you get to experience the care and adoration of a lover. Except its all about the positive side. No moody days, no stress on where you stand with one another – Just pure enjoyment.  With the girlfriend experience we have time to just relax and let things happen as they happen. Maybe we meet up and we just cant wait, and immediately connect for a passionate moment! Then spend a while after cuddling, giggling over little things, just enjoying one another, and maybe we do that for the rest of our time, maybe we go a couple more rounds. Maybe we go for a slow smoldering build of chatting over some champagne, or a meal, watching a movie, cuddling and then getting a bit more frisky as time goes on until we’re simply lost in each other.

Everyone’s experience is a little different. People enjoy different things, and a different pace. The girlfriend experience is more than just sex. It really is an experience. I get to know you as an individual, and I get to soothe any worry you have, and create a space where the troubles of the world don’t exist. We’re focused on the now, and the time we have together. The intense pleasure of each others bodies, as well as the deeply felt pleasure of simply getting lost in another person. It’s simply the best experience I have to offer, as well as the best experience for myself to enjoy as well. I feel so much fulfillment when I get to give this type of experience, knowing the person I’m pleasuring, helping them get to know me and my body as well. There’s nothing better.


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