Not every woman at Sheri’s Resort offers cunnilingus. If it’s important to you, ask. Some women really don’t like it. Others…meh. Some don’t get off on it. Some save it for their personal lives. Whatever the reason, be ready for her to say, “No, thank you.” Accept it and move on to other delightful activities!

Some of us do offer it though. If she says yes, there are things you need to do and know. First, please take time to give yourself a close shave, so your face is soft and smooth. Same idea for fingernails. Clip them, or better yet, get a manicure – it won’t kill you, and she will love it! Second, let me introduce you to the dental dam.

What the what?!?! A dental dam is a silky thin sheet of scented latex used to cover the woman’s genitals and anus. She will put a dollop of lubricant on her clitoris, place the dental dam over everything, so it’s wrapped up nice and tight, and then invite you on the ride of your life. Yes, it’s a little like having a picnic and throwing the blanket over the food, but the exchange of bodily fluids is verboten. And it still feels amazing!

Here are some tips when taking your woman to Orgasm Village via DATY: Identify the location of her clitoris by talking to her. It’s okay to ask directions, in fact, for this trip it’s required.

“Is this it, Baby?”

“A little to the left.”

“Here?”

“A little to the right.”

“Here?”

“Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!”

Pay attention to her body language. If she isn’t moving her hips, breathing hard, and grabbing your hair, you’re off track. Pull over. Have her show you which road to take by pointing to the map with her finger. Once begun, surprise, the destination may be seconds away! When she arrives, back off. Stop. If you’ve ever had a woman push your head away like an angry beast, it’s nothing personal. The mayor of Orgasm Village is Ms. Clitoris, and when she’s done presiding over this important business, she needs a break. Don’t touch her; she’s too sensitive right afterwards.

Also, don’t go for it again right away unless your lover tells you to. Many of us need to refuel. And, here is a shattering bummer… not all women are multi-orgasmic. Some are one and done, just like some men. And, like the weather, it can change from day to day. Some days she might come quickly over and over again. Other days, the trip may be long and bumpy. When a woman who loves cunnilingus isn’t able to come for whatever reason, it is still a great way to transition into penetrative sex. Pleasure for pleasure’s sake is good enough, even without reaching the destination. Enjoy the journey!

Going down on a woman is a skill you can hone with practice. Great lovers know that your tongue is at least as important as your penis – if not more. If you’ve never performed cunnilingus because you weren’t sure what to do, or were never lucky enough to have an assertive partner ask for it, I can teach you how to please me and give you confidence for next time. Pretend that you are a blind man, and you are trying to visualize the area in your mind by gently exploring it with your tongue.

Learn to take excellent care of a vagina and good things will come your way. You will walk taller and have more confidence in other aspects of your life. If something goes wrong at work, you can think to yourself, “Oh well, I give amazing head.” You will be the cunning one.

The DATY village charter is simple:

1.  Make sure you know where her clitoris is. Seriously!
2. Don’t lick her from top to bottom like a Saint Bernard.
3. Do not write the alphabet with your tongue. They were joking when they told you to do that.
4. Move your tongue slower and softer than you think you should. Be firm. Don’t tickle. And please, no sword-tongue.
5. Pay attention to her body language and the sounds she’s making. She should be grabbing your ears and grinding into your face! If she isn’t responding, stop and ask for direction. If she starts going crazy, don’t speed up. Stay the course, she’s about to come!
6. When she comes, stop, get out of the way, and take cover.
7. All women are different – sorry. These rules only work for me. But that’s the fun of being a good lover – discovering what other women like and learning new techniques.

Once you memorize the rights and privileges, be adventurous. Explore. Put your compass in your backpack. And remember, it’s no fun to travel alone!